No point in sleeping

After several gruelling hours of flights, I should be totally exhausted and ready to collapse, and yes, I would be, except for the fact that my rodent is MIA. GAH!! Why did I have to get a hamster? Whhyyyy? She's way too smart for her own good and busted out of the cage sometime when I was away.

Even after landing, I'm still dealing with the turbulence of my own self. Arguing, reasoning, talking, utterly boring myself to death. At one point in the last flight, about an hour from landing, I chanced to look outside the window and behold something beautiful, something I've never seen before.... stars way up above, clearer than anything, but under that the clouds exploded with lightning. I could watch the night sky for miles erupting in these bright lights. And it just kept flashing...

But I don't want to talk about me anymore, I'm sick of me this, me that, I want, I wish. If I think anymore of myself I'm going to inwardly scream. Trouble is, I don't know what to talk about. There's something on the tip of my tongue which eludes me, and leaves me frustrated, because the fall back plan for that happening is to think about me, myself and I again.

Seriously, I'm kinda po'd at that hamster...

I would like to know why I keep having dreams about men trying to kill me for whatever reason. In the dreams, I'm usually standing up for something of moral consequence, though it's forgotten by the time I wake up, and though the first was outright, blatant, I'm going to shoot you, the second... hmm. Imagine a youth group gotten together, some are wayward and fall into the scheme, and all these tall, dark, somewhat-handsome men are in black leather and have weapons, and are threatening you for something you did, but they won't take any distinct offensive action because there are so many other people about the place. They never actually kill me before I awaken.

I can't do this anymore, I have to go to bed, sick of feeling melodramatic, just want a good night's rest on a non-lumpy bed. My own, sweet, squishy, quiet bed.