As the clock ticks

It's 2:17 in the morning. Ugh. But I can't sleep, whether it's because I still smell like cleaning chemicals from the bathroom or whether something else is bugging me, I'm not exactly sure... probably a combination.

What do you do... when someone you trusted, someone who's been around, verbally slaps you in the face, and not even about you, but about someone else you hold close? What should I have done? I didn't defend my other friend. I just... sat there. And listened to the poison coming out in words shaped into an ugly beast, a reflection on the one speaking.

Anger and hurt surged through me in a violent rush of adrenaline, the blood in my veins heated to an uncomfortable temperature, but what did I say? Nothing. Absolutely, nothing.

And now, sitting cross-legged on the floor two and a half days later, where do I find myself? The hurt still aches. It was cruel, it was tactless, thoughtless. But my heart...? I can say I forgive her, say she didn't mean it. But those would be only words.

I've decided to not allow this to sit too deeply, my anger is nearly diminished, replaced by a sadness. Should I have done something? Should I still do something? For once, I don't even feel a hot-or-cold pull towards one thing or another.